~ Ariane's Journal ~

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~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Sat May 19, 2012 7:30 pm

A simple, leather bound journal is hidden away somewhere within Black Manor. It smells faintly of paper and ink and appears to be fairly new. However, if one should try to open the journal, they will find it is bound shut by a lock that can only be opened by the ankh pendant that Ariane's wears.

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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Mon May 21, 2012 7:48 pm

The 21st of May, 2012

A new composition in the works, along with many other projects involving improvements around the village.
The money granted to us by the elders should reap some fairly interesting awards.
I have been meeting many of the village's new faces since our arrival back home and have been settling in smoothly. There are some familiar faces lurking about, though most of them I have never seen before. Among all the people in the village, it seems that the person who says he is my cousin is the one who has me curious. He is rather shady in his ways and very secretive, and, while I hold secrets of my own that I do not wish to disclose, I have an unfortunate amount of curiosity building up within me. Then there are Anton and Cosain, two people who I am beginning to form friendly relationships with.

Cannot spend a good deal of time writing tonight, as there is much to do.

-A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Tue May 22, 2012 7:46 pm

The 22nd of May, 2012

A nice, relaxing day. Nothing too exciting happened.
I spent the majority of the day locked up in my room, working out the kinks in this new piece.
I met yet another few new faces today: Kane and Essik. The first, Kane, is another sanguine. He is very timid, it seems, but he knows of Alabaster from stories his parents told him as a child. I haven't quite formed an opinion of him yet. Then there is Essik -- a mage, I think -- who seems quite level headed. I'm interested in perhaps getting to know both of them a little more.

There is more talk among my elders of whether or not the Council should be restored to Alabaster. In my own opinion, it should, as I may have some natural biases towards the way things are done here and it is always good to get a second opinion on anything. Perhaps I will begin to keep careful watch over the villagers, to see if any of them are suitable candidates for a spot on this council.

-A

~*~

A small scrap of paper, taped under the entry... The paper is warn and obviously very old. In blurred ink, it reads:

The name spelt backwards. Prophetic? It may be... Was this an accident? Was this on purpose?
And who else has figured it out?
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Wed May 23, 2012 7:18 pm

The 23 of May, 2012

Why does this entire village believe I'm currently involved with Carrick...?
First Roman, now Cosain. What has this world come to?

Today was a day of learning, of finding out things that I did not know before existed.
And quite frankly, it rather terrifies me.

-A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Mon May 28, 2012 4:02 pm

The 28th of May, 2012

Finally -- A chance for me to sit down with pen and paper and write without interruption. The manor is silent at the moment... Well, except for the occasional crackle of the fire in the lounge adjacent to me, but that does not necessarily count. The halls are quiet and nobody is around to disturb me. I relish in these moments where I am alone with my thoughts... Where I can really get lost inside my own head, where most of my hardest thinking is processed by words, but by music...

I have been busy these past weeks, to say the least. Alabaster is as demanding as ever and commands almost every last ounce of my energy to keep it functioning. I manage though and am not entirely alone in my efforts -- the coven, its members, and those I find myself comfortable calling "friends" offer their assistance on the occasion. The coven. My elders are prying into my mind more often than not these days, "checking in" on me, making sure I am finding Alabaster "comfortable". This place is my home -- what else would it be? I suppose what they are more concerned with is what I know... I know they are wary of what I displayed the last time I visited the palazzo and are, perhaps, a little afraid of the same thing happening here. But it HAS happened. In small amounts, in short bursts, and only for equally as small amounts of time, but... Still, it has happened. Warding off the anger is not easy, but the others expect it to be. Every time I feel it creeping its way into my system, I know I am helpless until its spell fades away...

And that only makes me more angry.

Village news.
Roman attempted to leave Alabaster the other night, yet, I realized I did not want this to happen just yet. I don't know why and the question is still eating at me, but I cannot place all of my focus on keeping him here. I have barely scratched the surface on who exactly he is, and the closer I seem to get to figuring it out, the further he jumps away. This is... Not normal, to say the least. It is not what I am used to.

Carrick is with someone. A scholarly girl named Marianne - I like her very much, though I can sense there is something about her that isn't all together right. But who in this world really is?

Jack is getting better with his social skills. He clings to me less and speaks to others more. A relief.

Anton and I grow closer -- perhaps a little too close for my own liking, but he does not try to pressure me for information or anything else, so I suppose that it might be okay...

...Footsteps down the hall. A door has opened somewhere. I must go. I knew this would not last.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Wed May 30, 2012 2:32 pm

The 30th of May, 2012

The behavior of some people in this village perplexes me. They behave as animals -- no, scavengers, scrounging the streets and the halls for attention. Some of these people have, by far, the biggest superiority complexes that I have ever seen. They think they can get away with saying, doing, and acting in whatever they way they wish...

That has never been the case in this town and I'm not about to let it reign true now.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Fri Jun 01, 2012 12:51 pm

The 1st of June, 2012

20 days until summer is officially here, yet it still feels more like autumn as I sit here in the woods.

Some very confusing business going on today. It would appear that I've upset Carrick in some way, but I don't know how. I never know what he wants me to say to him, so instead of saying the wrong thing, I just keep quiet. One second I think we're good friends and we're getting along just fine, the next he's suddenly trying to pry into my head and get answers out of me that haven't even formed yet.

Lots going on with Roman. I can't write about it, as I wouldn't know where to begin. Just trust me that it's confusing and frightening, yet oddly intriguing, all at the same time. Life is like that usually, though, I suppose...

Spoke with that Viola girl today. She seems to be awfully full of herself -- saying that she's not patronizing me by calling me a child, when really, it is the fact that she seems to look down on me makes her one herself. Though I may be very young, I am in no way a child.

That time has long since been gone.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Sat Jun 02, 2012 7:18 am

The 2nd of June, 2012

Morning in Alabaster and I am the only person in the manor.

I had the dream again.

It hasn't found me in quite sometime though... I believe the last time I had it was when I was in Spain on the way back here. I woke up unsure of what was going on then and the same thing happened this time. I wasn't in my bed, either. I woke up alone in the medical center, my arms scratched silver and raw. Thank god Rose or Angelo didn't decide to come in early. That would have worried them.

I found my way home safety. My room's a wreck -- there's paper everywhere, a few broken shards of glass from god knows where -- but other than that, there seems to be no damage. I'm sitting in the dinning room now, listening to the sound of rain against the windows and hoping someone will come along soon to distract me.

I have big shoes to fill... But perhaps my feet are too small... What is this ache in the back of my head? Is it reason, stretching its arms back out to me, to pull me home? Or is it intuition, clamoring up from wherever it had been suppressed? Panic and anger and everything else... I want them to take it away from me, just as they took them away in Venice...

Frenzy. I need to be in the forest right now. This manor is growing too small and too familiar... Where did the stillness go?

"Do I dare
Disturb the universe?
In a minute there is time
For decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse."

(From "Prufrock", T.S. Eliot, Lines 45-49)

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Sat Jun 02, 2012 10:07 pm

The 3rd of June, 2012


Midnight now.

I fell asleep at my desk earlier, though it didn't do much for the tiredness in my eyes.

Roman showed up some ten minutes after I woke up. He was in a good mood and it stuck with him the entire evening. It was, in the most honest way of saying it, contagious. So much that I didn't realize my fever had returned until long after he left me, having walked me back to the manor after spending a little while in the forest. We are playing things by ear. That is where I feel most comfortable -- just going with the flow.

I have decided that, for once, I am not going to over-think my every action. No longer will I come up with impossible scenarios in which the absolute worst happens. I'm told that sort of thinking isn't necessarily healthy, anyways.

Anyways. When we returned, we discovered Jack badly wounded within the other bedroom. His body was thin and mangled and a horrible sense of dread filled me when I saw him that way. I think that, even though the incident was terrifying, it's helped me realize that I appreciate his company. He's a nice kid. His heart is in the right place and he's honest as anything. I don't want some enemy of his to end his life... There must be something I can do to help.

Everything is quiet now. I hope that tonight I will sleep...

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Sun Jun 03, 2012 8:18 pm

The 3rd of June, 2012

So I did not sleep very well last night, though I had expected I would after an evening in which I felt a lot better than I have in a while. I woke up in the forest this time, though I was under a tree and mostly out of sight. I can only hope I wasn't about anywhere else in the village. I am beginning to wonder what the cause of my sleep-walking, my occasional night-terror, really is. Is it perhaps my fever? Or am I simply just over-worked? It takes a lot of energy and time to keep the village functioning on even the simplest degree of sanity.

I took my work with me into the tavern this afternoon, where I caught up with Jack. Embarrassing as it is to admit, I actually dozed off, right there in front of everyone. I suppose it happens to most people at one point in their lives though.

I was called away from speaking to Roman and Jack by Angelo... I'd forgotten all about my weekly "testing". He brought me to the medical center and took one or two pints of blood, though I did not let him do so easily. I did put up a fight. I really did, but... It did not end in my favor. Maybe I'll speak to Rose. I don't wish to get him in trouble, as I know his behavior isn't entirely his fault, but if anyone can change him, it will be her.

It is time for me to try and sleep once more. I am contented. What curse within me has been borrowed for the evening and been put to better use. I am warm and my nerves have been soothed.

It is odd thinking back on how I was once infuriated by him, but now... There is something quite opposite.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Tue Jun 05, 2012 8:06 pm

The 5th of June, 2012

Questions develop answers. Even the smaller, insignificant details begin to have something more to them.

Matters are brought to light. There are new things that I discover every day. Things that I expected and things that I did not.

Two days passed now since the truth has come out. Two days since my own, identical truth was spoken as well.

I ask myself, "Do I dare?", and now, I think I may have my answer: I dare.

~*~

Today was rather quiet, for the most part. I spent the majority of it doing work (typical), both for the coven and for music. I found myself quite annoyed with Carrick at one point though. He made some comment about all the attention I receive (Attention I do not ask for, mind you, journal) and it brought about one of my... Episodes. Long story short, I punched a hole in the wall and injured my hand. Angelo had it wrapped for me.

It still hurts now, but the pain medication makes me sleepy...

~A


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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Thu Jun 07, 2012 6:16 pm

The 7th of June, 2012

An eventful day, to say the least.

In order to explain what really happened, I have to rewind a day. It turns out that Roman fed from Riane. Rose pulled me out of the tavern to tell me. She claims that while it was consensual on Riane's part, it was Roman who had originally offered. Roman told a different story when I spoke to him about it. It would seem that it had been her that volunteered originally and he had told her "no" three times before finally caving in. I was a little put off by the issue at first, but it was only feeding. There wasn't anything behind it, he says, and it didn't do much for him anyway.

I'm over the matter. Rose, however, is not.

She claims this "Riane" girl his her god-daughter. Not only that, but she is somehow MINE as well. I've never seen her before in my entire life. I swear I haven't. She says that my mother and her mother were close friends, but when I spoke to V via ankh last night, she said she'd never heard of the name Tenebrae either. What's more is that the name isn't in any of the coven record books, either. According to Coven Law, she isn't supposed to have an ankh, which she does. This whole situation is making my head hurt. She says she knows me, she swears she does, but... Nothing clicks...

Anyways. Rose wanted some sort of punishment given to Roman for what he did to this Riane girl. So, he and I planned a little "punishment"... It would appear we are both better actors than we thought. Hah! While it was not intended that he be hurt, he was, as Rose did something to his head. I must admit I was horrified when he passed out as a result of it...

The rest of the evening was spent back at Roman's place... Last night, he opened up to me and told me about the darker periods of his past. I also met his "other-side" -- it seems his side, which is called Toulouse, is similar to Cassius' in that it does not have a particular back story and carries itself with an aggressive personality. It makes me happy to know that he trusts me as I trust him. I opened up to him, as well, and told him about the scars on my back and how I got them...

Back tonight. It seemed that tonight we both came to a decision to carry something out... And it brought us closer than we had been before. It was truly something else and made me realize -- I quite enjoy not over-thinking or over-analyzing every single situation. It feels wonderful to rely on what my heart wants for once. It feels... Right.

I'm going to spend some time with Jack. I owe him some time. Going to see if I can cheer him up a bit.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Sat Jun 09, 2012 7:20 am

The 9th of June, 2012

It is still very early, but I find myself in the forest to do some hunting. Very quiet right now and the smell of a late night storm still clings to the earth. The grass is still damp beneath my toes, the river's current calm, and the sun just up to form a backdrop for it all. Moments like these make me wonder why I don't wake early to hunt every morning, as the woods are so... At peace with themselves. It is as if even if I were to find my prey in this very moment, its slaying would cause no such ripple in the world that is Alabaster.

Moments like these are the reason why I find myself so happy that I am here, home.

I'm not sure if Rose is still angry with me or not. I went to try and make some form of apology to her and she gave me the cold shoulder. She thinks we under-estimate her? That is hardly the case at all and is practically irrelevant to this entire situation. I know what she's capable of, though she claims nobody in the village does. I find that the village has become rather hypocritical as of late. People always claim that others cannot possibly understand themselves or their situation, yet they make no attempt at understanding or empathizing with others. Rose KNOWS why I don't know Riane. I understand I may have been a little hostile toward her, but wouldn't anyone else be on edge if a stranger appeared, saying they know all about you, when you have no recollection of even meeting him/her? I am trying to like her, I am, but her annoying little comments she makes around Roman honestly make me want to slap her. I wonder what Rose would say if she found out her god-daughter was disobeying her by practically clinging to him...

Jack's gone off elsewhere. He says Las Vegas... I think that's where he said his family is? I know he's quite angry with them at the moment, though why I'm unsure of. I told him to be safe. Hopefully he'll return to us in one piece.

I had an episode today in which I couldn't see a thing. Roman, Jack, and some other fallen angel were around the manor at that time. I sat around listening to them for a bit before I went to my room to clean up the mess of sheet music that I'd forgotten about. Roman followed me up afterwards and that evening followed a similar pattern to the one before it. The amount of freedom I feel in having pulled the restraints off my emotions for once remains invigorating. And my motto continues to be, "Screw what the others think."

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Sun Jun 10, 2012 9:29 am

The 10th of June, 2012

Last night: Consonance and crescendo.
This morning: Dissonance and decrescendo.
All good moments have their end.

I woke up from a nightmare, the usual one, with a brutal headache. I hunted, though all the energy I took went to waste when Khanate decided to shift into his lycanthrope form in the manor. Just when I thought I was going to befriend the man, I realize -- he isn't the brightest of bulbs. He claims he knows he cannot control his lycanthrope form, yet, he shifts anyways in the presence of many. The woods were open. The park was open. The square was open. Could he not have gone there? He went about the manor, nearly destroying the place, and I had to drain him to stop him. The bitter feeling of his energies still reside in me and this throbbing in the back of my head does not end. My muscles are sore and I feel like I've walked a thousand miles, barefoot, through a desert.

I could sleep for years.

But I have work to do. Plenty of it. None can be neglected and the village needs running.

Rose still seems fine around me, though she did roll her eyes a few times. Jack's back home with us, but he's not quite himself and I haven't had the opportunity to ask him what exactly happened on his trip. I feel bad, he must think I'm neglecting him, but my mind is so easily distracted by other things.

Roman's not himself. His pills have stopped working. I hope these is something Angelo can do for him -- I'm most certain he has something..
.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Mon Jun 11, 2012 8:46 am

The 11th of June, 2012


Another person knows now. About the severity of the illness. Angelo let it "slip", I guess I could say. So now Roman knows. About the coma, about the Germany Incident, why I can't remember Riane and really anything that happened between my fifteenth and sixteenth years. I go by what my journals say -- I do not remember my father loosing his memory. I do not remember my parents divorce. All I know is that it is so. Though I don't think he will, I am terrified of him suddenly treating me as some poor, sickly girl who's had this terrible time. Almost everyone who has found out about my illness looks at me that way -- As if they are afraid that one mean look will somehow strike me dead.

Even though they told me I only have twenty years left some twenty three ago, I do not believe I will be gone any time soon. I am strong. I know I am. I have beat this thing for over a century and I'm sure I could last another. I have never felt sick, not one day in my life. I have only felt the ache that comes with my bad blood.

I am not sick. I am merely presented another challenge to over come in my life. And I do it with a smile on my face every day. And I could do it for a million more.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Fri Jun 15, 2012 3:55 pm

The Fifteenth of June, 2012

Well, I never would have thought the village's lock-down plan would ever be used for anything other than a drill. It seems I have been proven wrong.

Some sort of plague has been brought into the village and Angelo sent me message to inform me that he simply didn't have enough treatment for those who had come into contact with the first person displaying the sickness' symptoms. He thought about the decision for nearly half a day, but in the end, he decided that it would be best to keep the entire village out of the streets until the disease is completely gone. I'm told it's fatal and if there is one thing I fear, it is those I care about dying from something that could have been prevented.

In order for travel through the village to continue, the centuries old tunnels that were built under the village sometime after the siege were re-opened. I spent the majority of the day exploring them. Nothing all too special, though they do smell of mildew and everything seems damp and dark. It is strange because I was almost disappointed, as if I was hoping to come across some big discovery on the village's history while down there. The only major thing I found was a spider the size of my fist.

Speaking of discoveries, it seems that I am not entirely what I thought I was. I always knew parts of me displayed sanguine qualities (When my eyes go green, especially), but I thought I was as psionic as the others on the Rossetta side of my family are. I discovered that I can, actually, feed from sanguine blood. This is a complete surprise to me because just like any other psionic, human blood is an acid to me. But vampiric blood (it came from Roman, so it must have been a lot of my blood in there too, I'm guessing)... Vampiric blood gave me a buzz which I have not experienced in a long time. It brings about a lot of questions: Can Cassius feed from energy? Can Mira? Do I NEED to feed from blood, or is it just an option? And lastly, will this do anything to my health?

I'm going down to the tunnels to think on these questions more. I shall write to Mira tonight to seek more answers.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Sun Jun 17, 2012 7:00 am

The 17th of June, 2012

Another day in the underground passes very slowly.

I have to say I'm beginning to grow annoyed with those who insist on offering me assistance during this... "Trying" time. People are behaving as if I'm incapable of handling myself. They ask me if I can manage the tunnels alone, if I'm having trouble feeding. Yes, my head is aching in the slightest and my throat is too, but feeding is something that can easily be done. But managing the tunnels? I've not been able to see for a century, possibly more. If anything, the darkness of the tunnels is welcoming. I don't feel as if I'm supposed to be seeing anything down there, as nobody else can either. As cruel as it may sound, it is rather amusing watching the others scramble around with flashlights...

I'm having trouble with Riane again, but it shouldn't surprise mas a much as it does. I am trying to act polite and civil to her as Rose suggested, I am. I was yesterday until she went about suggesting we should gas the city out and kill off the remaining plague victims. I explained to her as to why that would not be ethically and morally correct, but she still didn't understand and went on to imply that the sick have no purpose in the world and their lives have little value. Does she not know what it is like to be sick herself? It astounds me that anyone could think that way. Every day of my life, every moment I am able to inhale and exhale regularly, has more value to me than any other treasure in the world. Angelo gave me news of my illness the other day and as disturbing as his news was, I still live every day as if it were a gift to me. I do not think Riane will ever know that feeling, the feeling of waking up and looking at the sun streaming through your window, and thanking God or whatever it is I believe in that the sun is still there and my eyes are allowing me to see it. I do not know whether to feel sorry for her or be thankful that she doesn't know...

Anyways, she's been spreading rumors about the cause of the plague, saying that it has come from some hex. She read about this in a book, of course, and not everything one reads in this world can be considered true. I took it upon myself to tell her what would happen if she continued to spread rumors -- it would cause some confusion and possibly fear within Alabaster's residents. By law, I am required to ensure that they are safe and fear is as dangerous as any plague. I told her to stop speaking of the hex and warned her of what might come about if she didn't. She seems to think that my words are empty and that I am some... Powerless being. She underestimates me. I am not just the Head of the Rossetta, I am one of the few born and brought up in Alabaster. It is my home. She was born here too, yes, but her mother sent her away to the same school as Mira, and so, she behaves as Mira does: The world is HER oyster and everyone should fork over a pearl to her.

And now, hearing what she has done to Miya. Miya, the one my mother says was her only true friend, who has endured more hardship than most in this world, has returned to Alabaster. I greeted her with excitement and all the memories of the time spent together came flooding back... Her telling stories to Cassius and I as children, tugging at her ears and tail, letting her chase us around the forest whilst we screamed with fake terror and utter joy... And Riane has been nothing but rude to her, she tells me.

I will not have that. Miya is someone I trust, no matter her background, and does not deserve any of Riane's attitude.

The girl has lead a sheltered life, filled with riches and everything she could ever want -- not too far from my own upbringing. I don't know the cause of her terrible behavior that even Rose cannot see... She says I am the one behaving uncivil toward her? She has not seen what I have seen, heard the acrid, sordid words that I have heard. What comes out of her mouth is more putrid than any plague that could bestow itself on this village. It makes my hand ache to grasp my dagger.

Mother says it astounds her that Riane has been brought up so poorly. She says she will never be a Lady like her mother was if she continues with her attitude and will come to Alabaster herself to set her straight if she continues... Now that, if nothing else in this world, should frighten her. Bad things happen when V returns to this place... Even Angelo agrees with that...

~*~

What is this burning in my throat...? It grows more intense with every word I write... I must find Roman and ask him what is wrong with me.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Tue Jun 19, 2012 1:48 pm

The 19th of June, 2012

The days have begun to blur into one another, almost seamlessly. I loose track of time easily. My only means of distinguishing between day and night are the shadows cast across the pages of whichever book I am reading. I have heard the term "stir crazy" been used to describe the emotions of those of us trapped down here, though the term does not even begin to cover the restlessness I feel. I long to be out again, to pass through the manor doors and escape to the deepest area of Ravenwood. Looking out the windows, I wonder what the air is like. I see the rain that falls, steadily as usual, but wonder if it is warm, if summer has finally heard it calling its name. Even if it isn't, I should still like to be anywhere but indoors.

I've been spending a lot of time in the library, reading things that I didn't even know were there. Been practicing my French, since I've grown a little rusty. I wonder if it would be worth giving Russian another shot -- I don't really know why I gave it up last time.

A letter came last night, which Angelo delivered to me while I was working on a new composition...

Another sheet of paper has been slipped into the binding of Ariane's journal, a handwriting different than her own, longer and each letter more carefully written.

Ariane,

Darling, I haven't heard anything from you since you went home. You promised me you would write after a month or so, but nothing came. Have you written, or is your uncle just being lazy with the mail again? Everyone here misses you terribly, especially me. Your sister does too -- Mira's been asking about you almost daily, though I don't know why she just won't talk to you over your ankh... Strange girl. The Elders have been ordering her around more than ever and, as usual, she's more than happy to oblige to their wants. I'm tired of her just submitting to them over and over again. I miss how forward you used to be with them. I have patience though, as their order is near expiration and before long, our own order will be in place. The waiting game is coming to its finish; we just need to keep putting on a show until you no longer have to pretend the Entity is within you. I hope that you will find this to be good news, if it is news to you at all.

How is your health faring? Your sight? Have you had many episodes since arriving? Your uncle says your not doing too badly, though there may be some difficulties with your lungs? Are you overwhelmed? Are you alright with this plague that's happening?

You know you're more than welcome to visit us any time you want, darling. Don't be a stranger. The Pallazzo is just as much a home to you as the manor is.




I'm not quite sure how to respond to this, and if I should respond at all. The last time we spoke, it was not on good terms. It makes me very nervous that she is eager to see me at some point in the future. While I don't exactly want to visit, I don't want her marching on down into Alabaster, either. We'll see what happens.

About my feeding: Angelo offered me a bit of stored energy of his own today. As green as my eyes were, that was not what I needed. The burning in the back of my throat is returning again... I am anxious for Mira to get my letter, to see if she has found anything odd about her habits as well. I need to learn to have control over this, whatever it is. I cannot let it control me.


~A

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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Fri Jun 22, 2012 8:17 am

The 22nd of June, 2012

Our release from the tunnels is in the forecast for the next few days. I imagine we'll all go flocking to the exits and wind up shoving each other around in our desperation to get back outside. Angelo's said he may be able to sneak me out a few minutes before he makes the official announcement.

Speaking of Angelo, something is bothering him, I know there's something... He snapped at me again last night and it was as if something pent up came boiling out of him. I have never seen him like that before. There have been times where he's been cross with me before, but this... This was almost frightening. The only person that has seen its effects is Roman. I plan on keeping it that way. It isn't anyone else's business what happened and my face is nearly all the way healed.

I've decided that a trip to Venice is due. Now that I think back on it, I feel bad about not having kept in contact. My mother's worked very hard to alleviate some of my duties as head, and god knows that Mira practically gave her life for me... It's selfish of me not to give up some time to see them, it really is. I'm not sure exactly when we are going, but I did write back to Mother to inform her that I will be along some time during the summer, and that I will be accompanied by a friend, rather than Angelo.

I've decided to bring Roman along. Really, I don't know what put the thought in my head originally and still cannot figure it out. Is it that Angelo is beginning to annoy me? Or is it something else? He's rather hesitant about going and has told me why. I won't force him to come with me, but he hasn't said he's not going... So...

He fed, finally, last night. He had given me quite the scare and now that I know what his thirst feels like, I couldn't get the thought of what he must have been experiencing out of my head. I feel much, much better knowing he has fed and that his eyes are back to their normal bright green. My own are back to normal as well, thanks to him. Sometime after I fed, I felt my fever start to rise, though I ignored it. He gave me quite a scare, speaking of the future and saying that he doesn't believe we'll be the way we are in it... I suppose the stress of trying to figure out what he meant by that and how to react tipped my fever over the edge. I collapsed there, in the library, and had to be taken back to the manor. I can't say I hate many things in this world, but I absolutely hate the feeling I get from this illness. It is worse than the physical pain that comes with it and transcends normal levels of humiliation. I feel... Worthless in those moments. As if I have to have someone to depend on in order to simply survive... I loathe that feeling. He assured me it was alright, even after I apologized and I managed to calm down...

So, we talked a little bit after. There are some changes that are to come about within our relationship. Changes that others may not be so pleased with, but when have I ever cared what the others think? Never and I will remind myself of that every step of the way through this fog filled path of uncertainty that brings has brought me happiness with every mile passed...

Since when are you such a romantic, Ariane.... Hah.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:57 am

The 23rd of June, 2012

The sickness came on so suddenly.

I should have suspected my collapse two nights ago would lead to something more, but I thought nothing of it. It happened again yesterday afternoon, though I was alone and it could have just as easily been a visit from Ira. But this morning... This morning I woke up to more darkness, which wouldn't have bothered me if it hadn't been for the ache in my joints and the sounds of my brother's voice that often come with my fever. So, here I am, bed ridden for god only knows how long. The pain is excruciating and comes in waves; right now I am experiencing a break. Sweet relief fills me as I write.

This could be a short episode, maybe a day or two. I won't bother alerting anyone of it just yet, though I have sent off for Angelo, mad as I am with him right now. He is still my doctor and even when I have been mad at him before, he has seen me as his patient first and his niece second. He says he'll bring sleeping pills and pain medication to help me wait this out.

I suppose I should send a note off to Roman, but I would feel terrible for worrying him. I'll wait a day, then send something to him if this is still going on.

Now I can hear my brother calling my name once more, some distance away, telling me to hurry up and join him hunting... Another wave, another swell, crashing down.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Tue Jun 26, 2012 9:05 pm

The 27th of June, 2012

Better. I am slowly getting better.

This illness of mine usually works in cycles and, if it is moving in its usual way, I should be back to my normal self by the end of the week. This makes me very happy, seen as how the lock-down is officially over.

I went outside this evening, for the first time in what felt like centuries, though I only lay claim to one myself. It felt good to have the wind on my face once more, even if it was a little cold. Roman was there, surprisingly enough. He says he was not allowed to see me. It makes me wonder if he has been waiting for me these past few days. I did tell Angelo to let him know I'd be fine. Did he not deliver my message?

I am hoping that, if I am well enough, we will be able to leave for Venice sometime at the beginning of next week. I don't want to push myself, though. There will be plenty of time and Venice can wait a few extra days if needed, even if I am a little excited to be going...

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Tue Jul 03, 2012 1:33 pm

The 3rd of July, 2012

Well, it seems Venice was not what we expected it to be.

Upon arriving there, I sought out Mira, who didn't seem quite right, like she was keeping something from me. Only two days later there I've discovered she IS keeping something from me. Roman was the one that found this out through Valentina, who has clearly lost her mind to its entirety. I'm not the "perfect" child she wanted, it seems, and had something big planned to make me into what she wanted. I don't know what this plan is exactly, but I do know that it's very, very bad.

I write on a plane now. Roman and I are on our way to BlueAsh, where he expects the Rossetta will not look for me. My ankh was tossed out the window into the canal before we left so that I will not be tracked. Through everything that is going on right now, I have to admit I'm a bit afraid. This sort of thing has never happened to me before -- the coven has never showed any signs of any disapproval with me. What is so wrong with me that they felt the need to try and "change" me? The last comments I received from the elders were filled with praise for doing exactly what they wanted me to do... Something isn't making sense here. Something isn't adding up, but mark my words, I will find out what this missing puzzle piece is and destroy it.

If they intend on finding me, they best be prepared for what will happen if they do... They have always underestimated me, as I have always played the role of the sick, feeble girl... They have never seen me in my prime...

I will end this entry now. The plane is about to take off and Roman isn't looking so good... He's got a fear of flying and god only knows what awaits us in BlueAsh.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Wed Jul 04, 2012 9:31 pm

The 4th of July, 2012

I cannot sleep in this place. There is too much going on. Davikov Palace is unfamiliar and, though there is a fire not even one room away from me, there is something incredibly cold here.

I am safe here, Roman tells me that and I know I am, but that does not mean I am... Wanted. Alanya, Roman's psychotic ex-girlfriend is beginning to get to me. I knew I would have some sort of issue with her even before we arrived based on the stories he's told me, but had no idea she would be THIS bad. She likes to taunt me, pick fun at my height and my size. She says I look dead. I look at myself in the mirror and I suppose I do; my eyes a little too big and usually dark, my skin too pale, my ribs able to be counted if I stand the right way... No, Ariane, you musn't think that way. She's just a bitch. You've dealt with plenty like her before and you can do it now. Just shut her out while I'm here and all will be okay and forgotten when in Alabaster.

...My father was brought to die here.

I can't. Stop. Thinking. About it.

They told him it was to be a business meeting and instead he was brought to die. One floor below me, he died starved and tortured. And I hate him for doing so. I hate him for trusting them all so easily and not fighting them off... I hate that Alanya taunts me with the fact that Roman could have stopped it all, that he could have saved his life... But what would I be today?

I need to stop. I need air. I need to be outside. I don't care how cold it is out there -- I don't have my pills and I need to breathe.

Silly girl, it's been more than a century and you still cannot get yourself over these things...
Silly girl, you're just the same as you were th-...

~A

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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Fri Jul 06, 2012 8:47 pm

Not usual for Ariane, a letter has been written in the journal, or rather, copied into the journal from its original form. The handwriting much more more precise than usual and very formal.

To whom it may concern,

As of the night of the ___ of ___ in the year of 2012, I, Lady Ariane Elizabeth Rossetta-Black, born of Alabaster, of the Egyptian-Italian Rossetta (from Valentina) and Arabian-English Black (from Abel) bloodlines, resign from my position as head of the Rossetta coven.

The spoils of my resignation, as agreed upon on the contract signed on the 21st of December, 1960, will be as follows:

-The village of Alabaster, England, and everything within it, including the protected rights of its peoples, both born in the land and legal immigrant, any natural resources, hunting grounds, and relics.

-The portion of land in Romania won during the war that took place between the years of 1952-1957. This includes what resources remain there, both known and unknown, and the protected rights of any mythical that have settled in the area since its development.

My reasons for resignation are having to do with the following and can be elaborated on if a reasonable hearing is requested:

-Cruel & Unusual Punishments

-Torture

-Treason

Any further questions are not advised and as such will not be answered.
Signed [In Blood],
Ariane Rossetta-Black ... ___, ___, 2012


The letter ends here and under it, in her normal hand writing, is written:

A date is needed and then it is done.
And then I am free.

~A
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Re: ~ Ariane's Journal ~

Post  Jessyka on Wed Jul 11, 2012 1:46 pm

The 11th of July, 2012

Right now, I am in no-man's land. No longer a member of the Rossetta coven, yet not yet covenless. My letter of resignation is on its way to Venice as I write, soon to be in the hands of the elders. I can only imagine what horror will grace their faces upon opening it. And now, hearing that Mira's made her rebellion clear can only make the situation all the more frightening.

It would seem that for the past eighty years or so, Cassius, who has made an appearance in BlueAsh, has been part of an organization called Obisidian. They work against corrupted covens (like the Rossetta) and try to restore order to them. There's a lot of subterfuge and spying involved, I'm told. Mira and Angelo have both been working with this group for a while; apparently they were also tortured by the elders for "crimes" they committed. Hah! Mira? Commit a crime? What did she do -- Roll her eyes at an elder? Anyways, apparently this "Obisidian" group is planning to overtake the coven. I did not want to be at war with my own brother, and was planning on resigning anyways. The deed is done -- I sent the letter off about an hour ago.

I've never actually NOT been in the coven before, so I can only imagine that this will mean a major change in my lifestyle. A lot less stress and a lot more free-time, I would imagine. This may be quite beneficial to my health, now that I think about it.

Cassius knows now, though, about my "secret". I suppose it isn't really a secret -- most people assume the way Roman and I are is far from normal, anyways. The news was broken to him in a rather abrupt way though; I was desperately thirsty and Cassius bitten Paloma (new demon girl, daughter of Terra Valley, who the journal's say was my companion during my 16th and 17th years), which triggered me. Roman presented an opportunity for me to remedy my thirst, and so naturally, I jumped at the opportunity. The usual series of events was triggered by that and he saw it all. At first, he seemed horrified. Once I talked him down from his ledge (Roman was in a state of almost paralytic shock himself, then he did that thing where he gets annoyed and goes off on planet Roman), he seemed to relax, though he did confront me about a few more... Awkward issues this morning.

I miss Alabaster.
Isn't Siege Day sometime soon, anyways?

~A
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